My room smells like vodka and shame
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
