The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
You dont lie about slip and slides
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
