Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
