3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize