I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
