He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I will be naked everywhere
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
