But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Randomize
