does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
