getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Randomize
