the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize
