So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
