So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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