No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
