So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Randomize
