Got a toothbrush?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.