ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
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She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
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This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
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