Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
