You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
this beer tastes like vomit already
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Be still, my beating vagina.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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