When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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