Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
