I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize