dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
