:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
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