you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
