and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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