i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.