So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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