lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
