I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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