we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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