You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize
