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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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