This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
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