yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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