I think I just saw someone hide a body.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
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