i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
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