Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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