Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
