Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
