No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
