No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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