11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
