I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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