I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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