I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
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