sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
