I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize