Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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