Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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