OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
